Has anyone else noticed a rift in the time-space continuum? How is it that almost two weeks have passed since my last post? Anyway here I am again posting deep thoughts about world-shattering yarn related events. To wit:
There’s a very funny video put out recently by Staples High School senior Nick Ribolla called “Welcome to Westport”. In it Nick pokes fun at some of Westport’s, um, inconsistencies. One of the things he snarks about is that despite Westport’s presentation of itself as a suburban oasis with an artistic history, every other new business is either a bank or a nail salon. Given that I work at one of the last surviving, non-chain businesses in the area this subject is a personal bete noir of mine and the more I thought about it the more I started to believe that perhaps this all isn’t as innocent as it seems.
I used to think that these nail salons were just a front for money laundering and human trafficking but maybe their presence is actually more nefarious. A conspiracy even?? A conspiracy against using your hands to do anything productive! It’s another reason to put off learning or bettering knitting! (“My nails are wet” “‘l’ll ruin my manicure” “I need to get a manicure” “I’m thinking about getting a manicure so I can’t because my nails will be wet and knitting will ruin them”)
Personally, my nails send most manicurists screaming into the back room. Tails of the state of my nails have made it around the world to Korea where they are told to small children as a threat as to what would happen to them if they are not good. (“And your cuticles will be picked and chewed until they bleed…Mwah-ha-ha-ha-ha!!!”) And to add to my nails’ mythical nature I actually don’t care about them enough to get a manicure. There’s a word for people like me. I would like to think that that word is confident. Or assured. But really the word is: cheap.
But I digress.
I will admit that there are knitters out there (Danni) who can balance beautiful nails with lots and lots (and lots) of knitting and crochet. But Danni knits and crochets so fast that the yarn and needles don’t really come in contact with her nails so she’s really not a fair example.
So friends, in summary, stop paying so much attention to how your hands LOOK and start paying more attention to what your hands can DO.
Postscript: as I was composing this post my 16 year old daughter said to me “I was trying to decide whether to go for a run or do my nails. I decided to do my nails”. I kid you not.